in 5 years time...

Today marks five years.

Five years since complete and utter devastation, shock and pain. Of having my world turned completely upside down and challenging me in ways I never expected.

It's a completely bittersweet anniversary, but for the most part, I couldn't be happier. Not that it happened, but that I'm here five years on to celebrate this occasion. A lot of people in my situation aren't so lucky and I am completely aware of that. I'm one of the lucky ones, in a way. I owe it all to some very clever professionals, as well as the (continuing) support of my family, friends and loved ones.

This is something that is still hard for to me to process, 5 years on. The implications are so broad and it's left a lot of scars (literal, but mostly figurative) that are still tough to confront to this day. Still, being the eternal optimist I am, I've tried to acknowledge the silver linings.

- Am I stronger? Definitely. It made me fight for my existence and in doing so, helped me realize how much I am capable of.
- Has it caused me to completely re-evaluate myself? Undeniably so, to a positive extent I think.
- Has it made me seize the day, live in the present, and try to enjoy each moment as much as I can? Of course -- and while life goes on and this is sometimes muddied up with day-to-day occurrences, I still try to remind myself to laugh as much as I can, be kind to others and surround myself with great people and amazing experiences.

Because life seriously is too short. And on that note, a slightly corny but much-deserved shout out to my Mom, who was a saviour to me when this all happened. Despite being shattered to pieces and having every right in the world to fall apart, she managed to possess an inner-strength I hope I can one day achieve. And because of this, she helped me on my road to recovery. She was there, day and night, assisting me in any way possible - and then some. She did the essentials, but then she also did things for my mental sanity - like ensuring there were always guests visiting, or that there was a night out with my friends when I was able to leave the house. Without her, the entire process would have been so much more difficult -- in fact, I am not even sure how I would have coped.

On that note, I'm going to get some shut eye, but can't wait to wake up tomorrow morning (its 1AM now) and hopefully celebrate. The day will be a lot of studying, sadly, but perhaps an evening toast with some of my closest. To those back in Canada who have a much firmer grasp on this situation - I miss you all and wish I could be with you today to celebrate.

Cheers folks :)